There is nothing you can do wrong. This whole idea of not growing into selfless presence because we cling to spiritual names and experiences is erroneous. There is no presence free of self, until there is. The self is often a part of the present experience. And there is nothing wrong with it. Growth is learning to love and accept our present experience, whatever it may include. Yes it includes grasping to spiritual identities. Yes, it includes clinging to enlightened experiences. Yes, it includes not growing as fast as we may like, because we are not ready to let go of the safety blanket of ego-assuaging and pain-avoiding mental indulgences. You cannot bypass Presence. And you don’t need to worry about growing. Growth happens when life knocks you down. And that will happen regardless how wide or comfortable the blankets you use to shield yourself. Nothing can protect you from the cold hard ground of reality. But it is perfectly natural and acceptable to cling to the comfortable clouds of illusion that appear along our constant descent. Let life be the catalyst for growth. It will not fail to destroy and rebuild you, again and again.